India - The end
So I was walking away from a lovely marble mosque, enjoying the rare solitude due to the fact that it appeared to be too far for anyone else to walk, when a motorbike cruised up next to me and started talking. My initial attempts to fob him off failed and I ended up jumping on the back of his bike to help him fix up some English material about his artist school. There wasn't really much to do, a few lines on a business card, but he was very thankful and keen to show me a lot of artwork. Unfortunately I quite liked a lot of the pictures, so I ended up spending over an hour looking through the intricate artwork from many generations of his family. Sure enough sale time came and I thought I played a very hard bargain. From all of my purchases in India, this one had me happy afterwards, but looking back on it, I'm not entirely sure why. I probably spent the most amount of money out of anywhere in India there. I did actually feel friendly with 'Mukesh', and he offered to take me around for the rest of the day on the back of his motorcycle to see the rest of Jodhpur. After a lovely afternoon, Mukesh was keen to have dinner together, we nearly ate at a nice looking outdoor place but it was completely empty, so I went back to the hostel to have a look for my German friends while Mukesh hung out at his sister's beauty parlour. I soon returned to his sister's which appeared to be doing quite good business. This could have been because the closest other beauty parlour had a sign out the front saying "Beauty only for Alien girl".
Mukesh's sister and husband lived on top of the parlour, with their two kids. As with most houses in Jodhpur we could get on the roof and sit watching the sun set, changing the blues to crazy purples.
It was then that I realised how easy it was to believe in the many Hindu gods of India, it just seemed like such a religious place. Everything was so intense it felt like it must have a purpose and with the multiple gods and festivals going on, there always seemed to be an explanation.
I sat for an hour or two drinking scotch with Mukesh's brother in law and eating lovely tidbits. When dinner time came around we were invited to eat there, Mukesh's brother had been cooking a delicious chicken curry. It was a great night and as I said my goodbyes Mukesh insisted I should stay one more day in Jodhpur, he really wanted to take me into the desert on his bike to give me an experience I'd 'never forget'. I succumbed, having such a pleasant feeling about the whole day, and cancelled my travel to Jaipur (the pink city). The next morning I woke as early as I could, with a terrible headache, that Indian scotch is terrible stuff. I made my way to Mukesh's house (he had invited me to sleep there the night before but I'd already paid for the hostel), then we scooted off on his bike. First stop was petrol, 1000 rupees, a bit of a sting to the pocket (~$30), but I figured I owed Mukesh a bit for escorting me everywhere on his bike. Next I had to organise my train ticket to Agra, which was looking impossible as all the sleepers were reserved, however Mukesh had an uncle that worked in the train station, so sure enough I put myself on a waitlist and by afternoon I had a sleeper reserved.
The ride out into the desert can only be described as trying. The roads were terrible, unavoidable bumps for miles on end. After two hours my behind was ready to be thrown onto a barbecue. There were a few interesting sights along the way, first was what appeared to be an aicraft blowing up in they sky. I never found out what it was exactly, but there was a huge explosion and something fell out of the sky over the desert. The other really interesting thing was the sight of people walking along a long straight road in the middle of nowhere. They must have walked for over 20 kilometres along this stretch to reach a huge market out in the middle of the desert. Unfortunately I was feeling incredibly hot and burnt, my sunscreen had exploded in my toiletries bag somewhere along the way, and I had just run out. We finally reached our destination, another temple which 'was unlike any other temple'. Mukesh told me people crawl on their hands and knees to come to this temple during some festival period, and they even set up special food and drink areas along the way for all the pilgrims. Frankly I thought it looked just like every other Jain temple around, intricate carvings around a few jewelled statues. While I explored the temple Mukesh went off on his bike to find a cheap camel for us to ride on. He insisted that this must be done and would bring us both great luck in love if we rode the camel. Unfortunately it appeared to be an extremely expensive pasttime, at over 1500 rupees ($50). I was completely shocked at this price, it's astronomical in Indian terms and was not keen at all on the idea. Even in Australia I wouldn't pay $50 to walk around on the back of a camel for half an hour, and by this stage I was well adjusted to Indian prices. Unfortunately Mukesh was rather insistant, so I gave him 1600 rupees, telling him if it were anything more (he was telling me 3000 was the standard price for tourists) to forget about it. I sat in the shade of the temple wishing he would return without finding anyone. Alas he returned with a grin on his face, it was 1800 he said, but I could give the camel guy the other 200 after the ride. I sighed, by this stage I'd become positively negative about the whole experience. Mukesh kept insisting that I was happy and enjoyed this or that, which began to piss me off. He wasn't asking if I enjoyed something, his questions implied an answer, giving me no choice but to droan 'yes, I'm having a great time' like Marvin the paranoid android.
"Wasn't that an amazing temple?"
"Actually, I think it was just like every other temple I've seen"
"But there's nothing quite like this anywhere else in India"
"Well not exactly.."
"You'll never find any of this in your guide books, I'll give you the real tour of India, you'll never forget your time with me Tom"
The continual insistance of this, and how I'll never forget any of it began to really jar with me. For the first time in my trip I had a genuinely unhappy face on and I wasn't about to cover it up for Mukesh as he was the primary cause of it. We came to the meeting place for the camel and mounted it. The mounting process was slightly amusing, but the next 30 minutes were incredibly uncomfortable. I had a backpack with me, and we were forced to squash both of us onto the one camel, so I had to hold the backpack in front of me. The camel was covered in flies and insects, every few minutes it would dip its head while it attempted to kick itself in the chest with its front legs to clear them all away.
"Look a sand dune!" Mukesh enthused.
"We have plenty of those in Australia" I moaned.
"Isn't this great?!"
"I really can't understand how this is considered in any way romantic, it's one of the most uncomfortable experiences I've ever had"
"But it's the great story of the two lovers, you saw the pictures! You will have great luck in love now"
Finally it was all over, I paid the extra 200 rupees and we jumped back on the bike. As we cruised home I started thinking 200 rupees seemed about the right price for the trip as a whole and perhaps Mukesh had just pocketed the 1600 I gave him earlier. By the time we'd reached home I was certain of it, I even checked in my guide book (the place we went, including the temple sure enough WAS in my guidebook) and it said that the price range for an overnight camel trip, including camping under the stars was 300-1500 rupees. All this time Mukesh is calling me his brother and saying we are family now. His mother even invited me to return to India for his sister's wedding next year.
On the way home we stopped at a little market for some chai and deep fried veges, sort of like tepenyaki. As soon as we got off the bike a torrential downpour of rain came down.
"See that, Ganesha is with us" Mukesh explained.
It was quite amusing watching the stores over the road slowly blow up in the wet. There were 3 places all selling CDs with huge sound systems pumping, and I mean full volume, blaring music, each place a different CD. It was the most unholy alliance of sounds I've ever heard, I have no idea how anyone put up with it. When the rain came down though, the place in the middle's rooftop tarp overflowed and water splashed all over the place. There was a huge explosion and the music stopped. The other stores laughed hysterically and pointed until sure enough there was another massive pop and another one lost power with a great spark bursting across their merchandise.
The water subsided and we jumped back on the bike for another 2 hours of joy. Finally we reached Jodhpur and I slumped into the couch at the artist studio, completely wasted from a huge day of sunshine, sand and annoyance. Mukesh had the cheek to continue to try to push more artwork onto me. I couldn't believe how hard he was trying to sell this painting, it was quite impressive, a very detailed picture of an Indian face on silk, which you could scrunch up into a ball and release without creasing or damaging the painting at all. He was asking 50,000 rupees, which is a crazy amount of money. I was flabbergasted and getting more and more apathetic towards any sort of conversation with him, in total disbelief that he was still trying to force this down my throat. He ended up getting down to 10,000, telling me I could send him the rest once I sold it - he trusted me as a brother and guaranteed I could sell it for thousands of dollars anywhere else in the world. Needless to say I wasn't handing over another cent, and was anxious to get to my train, we actually only ended up making it by a minute or two. I was very happy to see the back of Mukesh's head, I took a peak in his wallet when he was retrieving a card for me and could see a few 500 notes which could easily have been the ones I gave him earlier. In reality, now that I'm in Europe, it isn't a lot of money, but the whole farce really gets to you. He was continually telling me how this kind of tour would normally cost 2000 rupees but he was doing it for me for free because I was his brother. I really felt sick every time he said this after I was pretty much certain he'd fleeced me for about that much anyway - I'm sure in his mind he was justified in taking it as a 'guide' fee.
About 10 hours later I arrived in Agra. It was about 6am, a great time to see the Taj, but unfortunately the baggage room at the train station wasn't open until 8.30am. So I dragged my bags with me onto a rickshaw and rode away with a funny moustached man who (like most Indian's) started talking about cricket once he found out I was Australian. Unlike any others though, this guy's favourite cricketer was David Boon. He was a pretty funny guy, he told me how he has a huge crop of marijuana in his back yard and he loves making milkshakes with it. He offered to take me around to the other side of the river where you can see the Taj for free, then maybe head back to his place afterwards, but I was totally spent with following random Indian's I just couldn't bare the thought of being taken for a ride again.
The Taj was as impressive as I imagined, I was fortunate to see it so early in the morning, the light was gorgeous. I stuck around for a few hours to see how it changed too.
Another train journey up to Delhi where another couple of cheeky punks tried to take me with an old trick. The taxis outside the train station were all in cahoots and offering nothing less than 100 rupees for what was a 50 rupee journey (according to my book). The book also mentoined a 'prepaid booth' where I could get this journey for 50 rupees guaranteed. Finally one of the taxis offered to take me 'on the meter'. There was much messing around as they fiddled with the meter, obviously trying to make it go at 10 times the normal rate until eventually we took off only to stop 200 metres down the road. They pulled up next to a "Official Government Tourist Information Office" and told me to go in. I went in for a laugh, the guy in the office was on the phone and told me to sit down. I just said look, this is a bloody joke, let me guess, the place I just called 10 seconds ago and confirmed a bed has burnt down, or doesn't really have a place for me and you have a great alternative? Then I just walked out the door and started walking towards my destination. The cheeky punks laughed and drove off, no doubt to wait for another tourist to attempt to capture.
I only had a night in Delhi, it was interesting wandering around town, some guy pointed at my feet and kept saying "broken". I was baffled but it turns out he was pointing at my sandals and sure enough, although I'd barely noticed, the stitchings were all falling apart. He offered to fix them all up for next to nothing, which he did with remarkable skill while we sat in a park and 3 separate men tried to clean my ears and 2 separate guys tried to give me an aromatic massage. The ear cleaning was scary, they wouldn't take no for an answer and one guy even shoved his cotton bud thing in my ear even when I specifically told him to take a hike.
So that was India, the food was delicious all the way through, the people were amazingly friendly and talkative, the salesmen were cunning, the history and culture incredible. One of the most intense and enjoyable places I've ever travelled, but not really for the light hearted. The only thing I've neglected to make any mention of is my bowels, which I shall now rectify. The whole time I was in India I had the most incredibly well formed poos, if anything they were bordering on too hard. I also had some crazy gas effects in the morning, I've never been able to fart like this. Finally on the last day of my trip I was hit with incredible diarreah. I think it must have been Giardiasis, it lasted for a few weeks, but that's for the next entries.
Mukesh's sister and husband lived on top of the parlour, with their two kids. As with most houses in Jodhpur we could get on the roof and sit watching the sun set, changing the blues to crazy purples.
It was then that I realised how easy it was to believe in the many Hindu gods of India, it just seemed like such a religious place. Everything was so intense it felt like it must have a purpose and with the multiple gods and festivals going on, there always seemed to be an explanation.
I sat for an hour or two drinking scotch with Mukesh's brother in law and eating lovely tidbits. When dinner time came around we were invited to eat there, Mukesh's brother had been cooking a delicious chicken curry. It was a great night and as I said my goodbyes Mukesh insisted I should stay one more day in Jodhpur, he really wanted to take me into the desert on his bike to give me an experience I'd 'never forget'. I succumbed, having such a pleasant feeling about the whole day, and cancelled my travel to Jaipur (the pink city). The next morning I woke as early as I could, with a terrible headache, that Indian scotch is terrible stuff. I made my way to Mukesh's house (he had invited me to sleep there the night before but I'd already paid for the hostel), then we scooted off on his bike. First stop was petrol, 1000 rupees, a bit of a sting to the pocket (~$30), but I figured I owed Mukesh a bit for escorting me everywhere on his bike. Next I had to organise my train ticket to Agra, which was looking impossible as all the sleepers were reserved, however Mukesh had an uncle that worked in the train station, so sure enough I put myself on a waitlist and by afternoon I had a sleeper reserved.
The ride out into the desert can only be described as trying. The roads were terrible, unavoidable bumps for miles on end. After two hours my behind was ready to be thrown onto a barbecue. There were a few interesting sights along the way, first was what appeared to be an aicraft blowing up in they sky. I never found out what it was exactly, but there was a huge explosion and something fell out of the sky over the desert. The other really interesting thing was the sight of people walking along a long straight road in the middle of nowhere. They must have walked for over 20 kilometres along this stretch to reach a huge market out in the middle of the desert. Unfortunately I was feeling incredibly hot and burnt, my sunscreen had exploded in my toiletries bag somewhere along the way, and I had just run out. We finally reached our destination, another temple which 'was unlike any other temple'. Mukesh told me people crawl on their hands and knees to come to this temple during some festival period, and they even set up special food and drink areas along the way for all the pilgrims. Frankly I thought it looked just like every other Jain temple around, intricate carvings around a few jewelled statues. While I explored the temple Mukesh went off on his bike to find a cheap camel for us to ride on. He insisted that this must be done and would bring us both great luck in love if we rode the camel. Unfortunately it appeared to be an extremely expensive pasttime, at over 1500 rupees ($50). I was completely shocked at this price, it's astronomical in Indian terms and was not keen at all on the idea. Even in Australia I wouldn't pay $50 to walk around on the back of a camel for half an hour, and by this stage I was well adjusted to Indian prices. Unfortunately Mukesh was rather insistant, so I gave him 1600 rupees, telling him if it were anything more (he was telling me 3000 was the standard price for tourists) to forget about it. I sat in the shade of the temple wishing he would return without finding anyone. Alas he returned with a grin on his face, it was 1800 he said, but I could give the camel guy the other 200 after the ride. I sighed, by this stage I'd become positively negative about the whole experience. Mukesh kept insisting that I was happy and enjoyed this or that, which began to piss me off. He wasn't asking if I enjoyed something, his questions implied an answer, giving me no choice but to droan 'yes, I'm having a great time' like Marvin the paranoid android.
"Wasn't that an amazing temple?"
"Actually, I think it was just like every other temple I've seen"
"But there's nothing quite like this anywhere else in India"
"Well not exactly.."
"You'll never find any of this in your guide books, I'll give you the real tour of India, you'll never forget your time with me Tom"
The continual insistance of this, and how I'll never forget any of it began to really jar with me. For the first time in my trip I had a genuinely unhappy face on and I wasn't about to cover it up for Mukesh as he was the primary cause of it. We came to the meeting place for the camel and mounted it. The mounting process was slightly amusing, but the next 30 minutes were incredibly uncomfortable. I had a backpack with me, and we were forced to squash both of us onto the one camel, so I had to hold the backpack in front of me. The camel was covered in flies and insects, every few minutes it would dip its head while it attempted to kick itself in the chest with its front legs to clear them all away.
"Look a sand dune!" Mukesh enthused.
"We have plenty of those in Australia" I moaned.
"Isn't this great?!"
"I really can't understand how this is considered in any way romantic, it's one of the most uncomfortable experiences I've ever had"
"But it's the great story of the two lovers, you saw the pictures! You will have great luck in love now"
Finally it was all over, I paid the extra 200 rupees and we jumped back on the bike. As we cruised home I started thinking 200 rupees seemed about the right price for the trip as a whole and perhaps Mukesh had just pocketed the 1600 I gave him earlier. By the time we'd reached home I was certain of it, I even checked in my guide book (the place we went, including the temple sure enough WAS in my guidebook) and it said that the price range for an overnight camel trip, including camping under the stars was 300-1500 rupees. All this time Mukesh is calling me his brother and saying we are family now. His mother even invited me to return to India for his sister's wedding next year.
On the way home we stopped at a little market for some chai and deep fried veges, sort of like tepenyaki. As soon as we got off the bike a torrential downpour of rain came down.
"See that, Ganesha is with us" Mukesh explained.
It was quite amusing watching the stores over the road slowly blow up in the wet. There were 3 places all selling CDs with huge sound systems pumping, and I mean full volume, blaring music, each place a different CD. It was the most unholy alliance of sounds I've ever heard, I have no idea how anyone put up with it. When the rain came down though, the place in the middle's rooftop tarp overflowed and water splashed all over the place. There was a huge explosion and the music stopped. The other stores laughed hysterically and pointed until sure enough there was another massive pop and another one lost power with a great spark bursting across their merchandise.
The water subsided and we jumped back on the bike for another 2 hours of joy. Finally we reached Jodhpur and I slumped into the couch at the artist studio, completely wasted from a huge day of sunshine, sand and annoyance. Mukesh had the cheek to continue to try to push more artwork onto me. I couldn't believe how hard he was trying to sell this painting, it was quite impressive, a very detailed picture of an Indian face on silk, which you could scrunch up into a ball and release without creasing or damaging the painting at all. He was asking 50,000 rupees, which is a crazy amount of money. I was flabbergasted and getting more and more apathetic towards any sort of conversation with him, in total disbelief that he was still trying to force this down my throat. He ended up getting down to 10,000, telling me I could send him the rest once I sold it - he trusted me as a brother and guaranteed I could sell it for thousands of dollars anywhere else in the world. Needless to say I wasn't handing over another cent, and was anxious to get to my train, we actually only ended up making it by a minute or two. I was very happy to see the back of Mukesh's head, I took a peak in his wallet when he was retrieving a card for me and could see a few 500 notes which could easily have been the ones I gave him earlier. In reality, now that I'm in Europe, it isn't a lot of money, but the whole farce really gets to you. He was continually telling me how this kind of tour would normally cost 2000 rupees but he was doing it for me for free because I was his brother. I really felt sick every time he said this after I was pretty much certain he'd fleeced me for about that much anyway - I'm sure in his mind he was justified in taking it as a 'guide' fee.
About 10 hours later I arrived in Agra. It was about 6am, a great time to see the Taj, but unfortunately the baggage room at the train station wasn't open until 8.30am. So I dragged my bags with me onto a rickshaw and rode away with a funny moustached man who (like most Indian's) started talking about cricket once he found out I was Australian. Unlike any others though, this guy's favourite cricketer was David Boon. He was a pretty funny guy, he told me how he has a huge crop of marijuana in his back yard and he loves making milkshakes with it. He offered to take me around to the other side of the river where you can see the Taj for free, then maybe head back to his place afterwards, but I was totally spent with following random Indian's I just couldn't bare the thought of being taken for a ride again.
The Taj was as impressive as I imagined, I was fortunate to see it so early in the morning, the light was gorgeous. I stuck around for a few hours to see how it changed too.
Another train journey up to Delhi where another couple of cheeky punks tried to take me with an old trick. The taxis outside the train station were all in cahoots and offering nothing less than 100 rupees for what was a 50 rupee journey (according to my book). The book also mentoined a 'prepaid booth' where I could get this journey for 50 rupees guaranteed. Finally one of the taxis offered to take me 'on the meter'. There was much messing around as they fiddled with the meter, obviously trying to make it go at 10 times the normal rate until eventually we took off only to stop 200 metres down the road. They pulled up next to a "Official Government Tourist Information Office" and told me to go in. I went in for a laugh, the guy in the office was on the phone and told me to sit down. I just said look, this is a bloody joke, let me guess, the place I just called 10 seconds ago and confirmed a bed has burnt down, or doesn't really have a place for me and you have a great alternative? Then I just walked out the door and started walking towards my destination. The cheeky punks laughed and drove off, no doubt to wait for another tourist to attempt to capture.
I only had a night in Delhi, it was interesting wandering around town, some guy pointed at my feet and kept saying "broken". I was baffled but it turns out he was pointing at my sandals and sure enough, although I'd barely noticed, the stitchings were all falling apart. He offered to fix them all up for next to nothing, which he did with remarkable skill while we sat in a park and 3 separate men tried to clean my ears and 2 separate guys tried to give me an aromatic massage. The ear cleaning was scary, they wouldn't take no for an answer and one guy even shoved his cotton bud thing in my ear even when I specifically told him to take a hike.
So that was India, the food was delicious all the way through, the people were amazingly friendly and talkative, the salesmen were cunning, the history and culture incredible. One of the most intense and enjoyable places I've ever travelled, but not really for the light hearted. The only thing I've neglected to make any mention of is my bowels, which I shall now rectify. The whole time I was in India I had the most incredibly well formed poos, if anything they were bordering on too hard. I also had some crazy gas effects in the morning, I've never been able to fart like this. Finally on the last day of my trip I was hit with incredible diarreah. I think it must have been Giardiasis, it lasted for a few weeks, but that's for the next entries.
posted by Flex at 11:34 pm
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